I was so excited when my fiancé proposed and I couldn’t wait to get my life with him started. However, I decided pretty early on in the engagement that I was going to want a pre-nuptial agreement before walking down the aisle. Since this is such a tough subject to approach I agonized over how to bring it up to my fiancé. After some careful thought I determined that the best thing to do was to sit down with my fiancé and talk about the details of our upcoming nuptials. This allowed me to work my way up to the subject of a prenuptial agreement.
Before we began the conversation I turned off both of our cell phones and computers so that we could talk uninterrupted, with no distractions. Then I began to discuss topics such as how much the wedding was going to cost and how we would pay for it. This allowed me to easily transition into the idea of a prenuptial agreement. I will admit, he cringed when I first brought it up. But once I explained it to him from a financial standpoint he started to slowly warm up to the idea.
Some helpful tips on discussing pre-nuptial agreements
- Timing: I chose a weekend to bring up the subject as this was a time when both of us are off work and we could have this important conversation alone and uninterrupted.
- Sensitivity: Your spouse may not feel the same way about a pre-nuptial agreement as you do. If they have thoughts or concerns, be sure to hear them out, and talk out each issue individually.
- Presentation: Explain how both you and your spouse may benefit from a pre-nuptial agreement by going over both of your financials. Approaching the subject from a mutually beneficial point of view can bring you closer.
- Honesty: Lying about your assets is no way to enter into a marriage. Approaching the prenup conversation from a perspective of trying to make the marriage stronger by discussing difficult topics in advance is a great way to show that you are there for the long run.
- Lawyer: Each of you should have your own attorney. Stay clear of do it yourself online forms, as they may be rejected by your local court. Your lawyer can make sure that your prenup is fair and reasonable for both parties. A family law attorney will have a food understanding of what issues to address and what to plan for in the future.
- Consideration: I don’t think it would come as a shock that your spouse may not be thrilled about asking them for a pre-nuptial agreement. After you have presented the issue and gone over the facts and figures, give you spouse time to think it over.
Pre-nuptial agreements are not just for the rich and famous. If you have stocks, own a business, one spouse will be supporting the other through college, or you have a considerable income gap between the two of you, a pre-nuptial agreement may be exactly what you have been looking for.
If you are considering a pre-nuptial agreement, take advantage of a free 30 minute consultation from the experienced attorneys at Wall & Wall Attorneys at Law PC by calling 801-441-2388 or visiting us online.
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