Remember the long list of attributes you had when looking for a date in your twenties? It seems that once people hit thirty, they are dating with more intent than before. Most are looking for attributes ranging from general traits such as being humorous, adventurous, smart, kind, to specifics such as demonstrating a love for baseball. When looking for a partner at this age, chances are that you will be looking for someone with whom you can build a future with. Here are important qualities to look for:
1. Maturity
Being overly emotionally dependent on you or devoting half of the day to playing video games is a sign of immaturity. A mature person should be financially responsible, be even-tempered and have a clear view of themselves and what’s around them. Such a person will have the self-control needed to pursue their set goals and progress in life. They will not be overly possessive or jealous as they know they cannot force someone to build a relationship with them. Should issues such as a divorce come up in the future, you can be sure that a mature person will view issues such as child custody objectively.
2. A Self-Sustained Personal Life Separate from Yours
Relationships are not about merging two lives together until each cannot be distinguished. Rather, it is about supporting individual goals and coming up with common ones. A relationship takes constant work. It behooves you and your partner to have the willingness to work and grow together, therefore, get a partner who’s willing to do so.
3. A Similar Worldview
While you might not agree on absolutely everything, it is important that you share the same values and beliefs. Having the same beliefs about issues such as child-rearing, work-life balance, social obligations, and religion implies that there will be fewer issues to argue and fight about.
4. Empathy
An empathetic partner should be ready to listen rather than just wait for their turn to voice their thoughts. They should be kind and sympathetic when you are in pain instead of being annoyed or seeing you as an inconvenience to them.
5. Conscientiousness
A reliable, organized, practical, and rule-following person is bound to bring such traits into the relationship. A less conscientious person acts carelessly, doesn’t pull through with set plans, and fails to meet their obligations.
6. Emotional Stability
Look for a partner whose emotions are rational. An emotionally unstable person is bound to be anxious, moody, touchy, quicker to anger, and generally difficult to deal with. Such people are more likely to have argumentative and negative interactions with the people around them, including their spouses.
7. The Ability to Accept Who You Are
While a partner might have all the listed characteristics, they might not accept who you are. At 30, you are bound to be carrying around quite some relationship baggage. Should your potential partner constantly point out your perceived shortcomings, none of you will be happy. Every healthy relationship should be based on unconditional support and love for each other, flaws and all.
Most people are stuck in wrong relationships because they fear to be single at their age. The above guide will help you look for another partner even at an advanced age.
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