Sometimes, divorce splits apart more than a marriage. The holidays are around the corner, but traditions are forever. It can be tricky to navigate the waters of a new divorce—particularly when the marriage solidified old holiday cheer. Don’t worry: It takes time to get settled. In fact, the holidays are a great opportunity to build new traditions. Before you do, though, you should determine which pre-divorce traditions to keep.
Keeping Old Traditions: Family Matters
It’s important to remember the children. They need to be comforted and nurtured. If you’ve experienced a divorce, it can be difficult to manage your child’s holiday expectations. When planning the holidays after a divorce, you’ll need to be fully involved in “adult mode.” Include old traditions which the entire family stuck with, and help them feel comfortable throughout the weeks.
Planning Ahead of Time
If possible, set aside some time to plan with your ex-spouse before the holidays. Meet in a neutral place, and outline which pre-existing holiday traditions are important to both parties. Then, determine the best way to make sure your child gets to experience as much holiday cheer as before.
New Holiday Tasks
You can expand your holiday traditions, too. Sometimes, divorce can make children feel like they’re insignificant. By handing down important holiday tasks, you can make them feel more involved. Remember: It’s important to keep everyone from feeling unimportant or alone.
Creating New Experiences
Sometimes, it’s healthy to create new experiences. Expanding your holiday cheer social network can help, as can planning out-of-the-house dates with your child. If your family is larger, you can still make new activities based off of old festivities. Remember, however, that you should negotiate schedules with your previous spouse before setting anything in stone.
At the end of the day, the goal is to create all-new, positive family memories. Let go of any angry feelings before the holidays roll around, and maintain respectful communication with your ex-spouse when around any children. Kids are smart. They can pick up on verbal and non-verbal communication signs alike. Don’t bad-mouth anyone, and focus on minimizing any pre-existing conflict to maximize cooperation.
Crafting Positive Memories
You can create, maintain and expand upon this year’s experiences, too. Don’t be afraid to get experimental, and try focusing on each tradition’s silver lining. During Christmas, a big dinner can still be a fun—and sometimes affordable—alternative to having too many presents. The holidays are for visiting with loved ones, and they shouldn’t be neglected due to a split-up.
Regardless, it’s important to make sure you take the time needed to recover from divorce. The post-divorce lifestyle can be difficult to manage, and it’s important to make sure everyone is involved as much as possible. Take care of your children, and reduce their stress and worries whenever possible. Eventually, you’ll navigate through any rocky patches. Eventually, you’ll have a wonderful mix of new and old traditions—and these traditions can make an entirely new experience.
For a Free Consultation, Contact SLC, UT Divorce Attorneys at Wall & Wall Attorneys at Law
At Wall & Wall Attorneys at Law, we are a family owned and operated law firm in Salt Lake City, Utah with caring and experienced attorneys ready to help. We work with divorce and family law related matters. We understand that going through a divorce can be a complicated process. Give us a call today for qualified professional guidance through your situation. Contact Wall & Wall Attorneys at Law by scheduling a free 30 minute consultation online or giving us a call at 801-441-2388.
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